Peaception: You Have Done What To My Mother?
Why I Sometimes Hate Online Gaming
I try to play online as much as I can, who the hell am I kidding I play almost every day. After a hard day’s work there is nothing more stress relieving than playing with friends for a couple of hours, but playing online is not always as calming as you might think. These are some of the things that I find annoying.
The guy who knows your mother in an intimate way:
I was in a lobby with this guy who was swearing and just downright being rude to others so when he was told he needed to relax he promptly replied, “Your mother wasn’t complaining last night when I was on top of her.” Seriously guy. Most of the people guilty of this are kids between the age group of 11-18 and I blame the parents. Yes parents I blame you, you breed these children who should be used as examples of why birth control and abstinence is important and unleash them on the online world without proper supervision, now they are busy telling me what they did to my clueless mother. In very rare cases you get grown men who actually say this to others which is just a huge cry for help, I don’t know about you but nothing screams ‘I need therapy ASAP’ than an adult voicing on a public forum his sexual fantasies about other people’s mothers. I think those mother insults have now reached their sell by date and are not insulting as they were in the 1800s, so it’s time for new material, or better yet, time to mature.
The guy who complains about EVERYTHING:
If they play against a better player they complain it was lag that got in the way (law of the universe, there will always be someone better than you, deal with it and move on). If he is the only one getting more kills in the team, he complains that the others aren’t pulling their weight (who died and knighted you Sir Kill-A-Lot? Relax, it’s just a game, when you start taking it that seriously then it’s time to join the army or better yet, go watch Rambo for the 100th time). If you are in the same team, he constantly complains that you are stealing his kills (hello moron it’s a team based game, you win as a team. What are you supposed to do when you encounter the enemy and he is still trying to kill them? Stand still and hope for a quick re-spawn? I don’t think so). I could go on and on about this type of person, he just loves to complain and nothing will please them when playing online which I think is rather sad because games are meant to be enjoyed.
The guy who is just too good:
As more clans are formed, the more good players there are online to play against, which is both a good and a bad thing. I enjoy being in a game with a good player just as long as I’m in their team. I actually don’t mind getting killed because it’s part of being a not so good player but sometimes after a long day’s work, getting killed online a lot isn’t that comforting and so I was having such a day not so long ago. There was this player, caldenbartlett, he killed me so many times I began questioning my sanity. I thought he was playing in a different realm where time is way faster because it would explain how quickly he killed me, I would be on a ledge and he would kill me, I would be running around and he would jump in front of me and kill me, I would be turning a corner and you guessed it he would be there and kill me. With every kill he got it killed my will to play and as soon as the match finished I was done with the game for the night. Sometimes I wish there would be separate lobbies for competitive players were they play against each other and we normal civilians are spared their presence. When I’m having a good day though, I don’t mind dying, actually I welcome it and take it in my stride.
The guy who is a weapon expert:
He knows every type of gun in an FPS, he can advise you depending on what map you are playing, what guns and attachments to use, he is like one of those wine connoisseurs, only he deals in guns. This type of guy is very useful if you are clueless about which guns to use and need help but after some time it can get annoying. The conversations usually starts like this: Gun Expert: “So what gun do you prefer using?” | Me: “A gun that shoots bullets and kills the enemy.” | Gun Expert: “We have a comedian over here, but seriously though with the small maps rather use a PDW with long barrel, FMJ and reflex sight and for the larger maps maybe an M27 with foregrip, fast mag and millimetre scanner” | Me: “Can I have that in English please?” As soon as a game is released they are already an expert on the guns available in the game, I don’t know it’s like they get a special edition of the game with a gun manual accompanied with a video or something. After numerous times of hearing about which guns are best to use at some point you become numb and just want to shout, “I don’t give a hoot about the guns and if the next CoD had bananas in place of them I would not care, just as long as that banana gets me kills.”
The guy who rage quits:
If you are not familiar with rage quitting it is when someone leaves an online match without finishing because they are either frustrated or annoyed. This is what usually happens with rage quitters: “Oh my god a camper,” rage quit, “Did that guy just knife me even though I shot him first,” rage quit, “I’m dying too much, it’s going to affect my K:D ratio,” rage quit, “Did your character just run faster than mine,” rage quit. If rage quitting was an Olympic sport this person would usually take gold but they would probably not even claim their medal, most probably because they would have rage quit the event. I do admit I have my moments of weakness were I have rage quit but this rarely happens. It does get frustrating when you are in a team and half those players decide to leave the lobby and now you are outnumbered, it’s a horrible situation. Rage quitters just need to learn to finish the fight, yep I channelled some Halo there.
Despite the pitfalls of playing online it’s still an awesome way to unwind and I have to say those moments of fun outweigh the moments when I’m annoyed. So if you haven’t tried playing online give it a whirl you will be surprised at how much fun you might have and who knows, you might stumble across these types of people, which is not that bad because they can be entertaining and there is always the mute button.